Several years ago, during the workshop, all women, I was surprised to hear a young woman to my lunch table announce: “I am looking for a husband. So when you go home, think of me. “Surprises and fun – it was my first experience of such a direct approach – soon gave up thinking:” Why not? “Miss X is in his thirties and have no time to lose to find Mr Right in. A nice, outgoing, and accomplished in his profession, he may have landed a date in the office or the gym crowd with no problem. But she was a practicing Catholic and I wanted to meet someone who shares their values before they consider them now. Everything else is a waste of time. I’m reminded of Miss X (now, fortunately, Mrs. right) in a recent article in The New York Times described the agreement between the Muslim American court. Here is another community of faith, much more socially defined as Catholics, but also immersed in secular culture, more or less the enemy of their sexual values and customs. Born into a tradition of sex segregation of public and arranged marriage, Muslims are fighting to maintain the sanctity of marriage and family, while recognizing that their children choose their own friends. Whenever possible, they want to come and friends of their own community. A plan they have developed a banquet “conjugal” – a form of speed dating (although it rejected the term) that proved extremely popular with the Islamic conference held earlier this month. According to the Times: “The event was one of the great draws of the Islamic Society of North America annual conference, which attracted thousands of Muslims in Chicago during the weekend Labor Day, with many participants bemoan the relatively low number of qualified candidates in large cities. addresses “There were two banquets, with a maximum of 150 males and 150 women participating each day at $ 55 each. They sat 10 per table and rotate every seven minutes. At the end of the hour ‘ social one hour then allowed participants to collect e-mail and figures during the pasta dinner with sodas. Organizers said many women are always looking for people to approach their families first. Some families accept that the couple can then meet in public, others not. “ The meetings are held under the keen gaze of parents – mostly mothers – who were parked on one side of the reception room to avoid interference and which is “alternate between craning their necks to see who their adult children meet or bios skulduggery , photographs and telephone numbers among themselves. “ Some are skeptical, however, and the organizers of the Convention can not say “at least 25 marriages over the past six years. Love Trap As Muslim parents are afraid of all American gathering places, which are equated, quite justified by the evidence, and that sex before marriage – a serious sin in my book (as well as among Catholics, truth). At the Chicago convention was a seminar on how families can “save” children from meetings, one participant suggested that Muslim mothers could get together as “Mothers Against Dating” – as the mother against the Drunk driving. Morally, they believe, it is so dangerous. But even eliminating the criterion of sin, to ask the utility of dates in its popular form. Not exactly, judging by the growing gap between the many people who claim they want to marry a number of nodes. Gallup poll shows that while marriage remains a state or a target of 91 per cent of Americans, the proportion who actually are married has fallen from a peak of 77 per cent in 1960 to an average of 53 per cent since 2000. Of the remaining 11 percent are divorced, and 24 percent are single or living together – from 9 percent in 1960. (1) Stories abound of single 30-something years of a desire for a soul mate, and the anxiety of mothers taking matters into their own hands. A recent study of women over 40 years by the British magazine Woman & Home, shows that the concern of many of their young adult children select a suitable partner. Wall Street Journal several years ago to be a mother so that people did not like his daughter from the profile prepared for it with a dating service online – and scored a game. By logging on love Driven by a failure of pubs and clubs for the production of goods, online dating has become a boom industry, with hundreds of websites and hundreds of dollars of market of millions of dollars. British dating service Parship claims that 50 percent of people believe that one day he will meet a suitable partner, so (2), but that’s probably wishful thinking. There is plenty of room for deception in online dating: fake profiles or long-term and real airbrush misrepresentation of age, it seems – just about everything. And there is no guarantee that a person looking for more sex. More reliable, perhaps, the major players such as Match. com, who play their reputation in the scientific approach (including a 146-point interrogation point to the old idea of the four personality types), and in particular the twin sites including those serving a particular community of faith. But there are still differences to be among them. For example, U. S. CatholicMatch site, which began seven years ago life as StRaphael. Net (St. Raphael the Archangel, who led the Sarah Tobias), has launched a staunch Catholic geeks who like having the entire line of matching singles community, a place that helped create friendships, weddings, and even vocations to the priesthood and religious life. Muslim. com, on the other hand, is one of the many specialized sites dating, most of them with the name of Cupid, is managed by the Australian interactive connections. It provides an opportunity to find “partners or life of a Muslim marriage for Muslims only” – a distinction that the older generation of the community may not appreciate. Speed Dating If all this seems too impersonal or long term, there are always speed dating – the group method of introducing the Convention Muslims used for their wedding banquet. Replacing the old formal twinning, speed dating is credited Rabbi Yaacov Deyo Jerusalem which was conceived as a means of ensuring that only more Jews were found in large cities where they were outnumbered by the non- Jews. These structured events that have hit Japan and China, as well as in the United States and Great Britain, have certain advantages over general mixing and talking, but they tend to superficiality. Study conducted in 2005 at the University of Pennsylvania in the speed dating event found that most people have a choice in the first three seconds of the game. Issues such as religion, previous marriages and smoking habits were found to play a much smaller than expected. Limited as they are, these results are consistent with research showing that young adults addresses the issue of marriage to a large extent on an emotional level, and this may explain why research is often counterproductive. Marriage – but for what? Five years ago the marriage project at Rutgers University dedicated its annual statement of our conclusions Union report on the attitudes of 20 – to 29-year love and marriage. It showed that young people are looking primarily for a soul mate, someone who can make a “profound emotional and spiritual connection to life.” However, most of them think they can do so without giving weight to other religions or prospects of raising children: only 16 percent in the survey agreed that the main objective of marriage is having children, and young women have seen their economic independence as a necessary prelude to marriage. In addition, 62 percent said that living together before marriage is a good way to avoid divorce – the belief that more and more inconsistent with reality. ”Taken together, the results of the survey presents a portrait of marriage as a profound emotional, social and shallow,” the authors conclude. It is difficult to see such a narrow, individualistic idea of marriage as something other than a stalemate. Although the personal and romantic has long been an integral part of the marriage of the West as recently as a generation before the social dimension is still important. public commitments of the couple to another for the purpose of the family. Without this exercise all seems rather pointless and seek a soul mate doomed to failure. What about young people who do not wish to marry in the full sense? What good do it if they have rarely met anyone else who does not? For some people always want to say, “It takes a village to raise a child.” Even more, perhaps, it takes a village to marry – the settlement or its equivalent. Religious communities, in particular, should play a more proactive role in bringing young people together. And access to more imagination – we are not talking about the socials in the parish hall. Maybe the Muslims are onto something with his double Banquet. Perhaps the online community or the Catholic Jewish speed-dating events have something to offer. Nearly a century ago, in Catholic Bavaria, Pope Benedict XVI met with the parents through personal ads Joseph Ratzinger senior placed in local newspapers. good marriages often need help and that can take several forms.


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